Help Me Reach 12 on the Manly Scale of Absolute Gender

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Sunday, November 21, 2004

Rep. Machiavelli meets Sen. Acton

Rep. Ernest J. Istook
US House of Representatives

Dear Rep Istook*,

Kudos to you for your efforts to make it possible for the chairs of the House and Senate Appropriations Committees and their agents to review the tax returns of private citizens without restriction. It was a gutsy move on your part, but one that will surely put you in the history books along side such great Americans as G. Gordon Liddy and E. Howard Hunt.

But why stop there? Why not give the chairs and their agents the authority to break into doctor's offices to view our medical and psychological records? Don't you think that it's important for the Republican Caucus to know whether my neighbor, Bob, a known Democrat, has ever been treated for a sexually transmitted disease. And wouldn't wiretap authority be a big help in our efforts to consolidate power? Just think how much time the honorable Rep. Tom DeLay would have saved if he could have bypassed the Department of Homeland Security when he was trying to track down the Texas Senate Democratic Caucus.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

*The Zip+4 for Rep. Ishtook's Shawnee, OK office is 74801-6962.

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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.