Jesus' General

Our Leader is going to create a "Warren Commission" to look into intelligence failures

I know many of my fellow patriots were angry at the Democrats for demanding an independent investigation into the recent intelligence failures in Iraqistan, but now that Our Leader says he'll do it, I think we should follow Mormon apostle N. Eldon Tanner's instructions, "When the prophet speaks, the debate is over." That won't be hard for me, because I changed my mind the minute I heard Our Leader wanted to do it.

Our Leader's wish should be enough in itself, but the fact that it's an ingenious plan, should make everyone happy. Here's how the AP describes it:

The senior White House official said it would be patterned after the Warren Commission, so named for its chairman Earl Warren, a former chief justice of the Supreme Court, which led a 10-month investigation that concluded in 1964 that Lee Harvey Oswald acted alone in killing President John F. Kennedy

This has to be Mr. Roves idea. It's pure genius. The phrase, "Warren Commission," is synonymous with "integrity" in the public's mind, and I'm certain that the final report will forever shut the door on treasonous speculation, just like the Warren Report did.

I'm also comforted by the fact that Our Leader will be picking the panel members. Otherwise, the scope of the investigation might include the good things being done by the Department of Defense's Office of Special Plans, a group created by the White House to deliver better intelligence than that provided by the CIA. The Office of Special Plans came up with most of the intelligence about Iraq's weapons of mass destruction and its links to terrorism. We need them to continue their important work so that we can find out where Iraqistan's WsMD went after they were smuggled in to Iranistan and Syriastan.