Greetings, Fellow Republicans: Lynne Cheney here, addressing you on behalf of my husband, Vice President Dick Cheney, the most powerful man on the planet.
Dick asked me to send his regrets. We had a few martinis tonight at the undisclosed location after watching George Tenet's testimony, and Dick's pacemaker started skipping beats again. So Marlee Matalin is tucking him in while I dash off a quick note to you in his behalf.
(And you can just simmer down, Rudy "Tranny" Giuliani! A little bit of Tanqueray isn't going to keep Dick off the ticket.)
So. First things first: Dick says George Tenet is full of shit.
Dick is very aware of all the criticism of late, and has been holding his fire. You don't shoot all your skeet on the first pull, says Dick!
But enough is enough: George Tenet is a pathological liar; those are Dick's very words. The CIA did cartwheels over those WMD semis. George Tenet called them "Trailers Of Tragedy," or "Warrior Winnebagos" or somesuch. Made it sound like Armageddon -- at least, in their "private conversation," as Kevin Kellems described their purely social encounter.
So. Here's the word, straight from Dick: George Tenet is a liar. Scalia couldn't shoot a duck with a Howitzer. And our little Mary will tie the knot with some pussy-licking bull dyke over Dick's dead body -- or a cunningly amended Constitution, whichever comes first.
Cheers!
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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.