Help Me Reach 12 on the Manly Scale of Absolute Gender

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Sunday, April 17, 2005

Gabriel wields a wicked knee

Derek Packard
Light on the Hill TV

Dear Mr. Packard,

I just signed up to receive your Justice Sunday webcast. I want to thank you for working with Sen. Frist, Dr. Dobson, and Mrs. LeHaye to make it so readily available to those of us who are unable to attend.

That said, I wonder if Justice Sunday is really the best way to begin the great judicial purge. You, more than anyone else, know the importance of erecting a prayer shield before undertaking something this important. It can mean the difference between winning or losing a battle. As you note on your Call to War website, a good prayer shield can be employed offensively as well as defensively. That's what you said happened in World War II when an American prayer shield caused Hitler to invade the Soviet Union.

Perhaps we can use Justice Sunday to erect a prayer shield against the judges. We could pray for the holy spirit to intervene anytime a judge is about to deliver an ungodly opinion. Picture this: an angel of God, dispatched by our prayers, kicks a judge in the nuts every time he reaches for a pen to sign a decision requiring that homosexuals be treated like human beings. Do you think that judge will ever actually sign it? I don't think so.

Some might say that prayer can't be used to instruct angels to kick judges in the nuts. Such people simply lack faith. If prayer can be used to cause the invasion of the Soviet Union, it can be used to bring about a little miraculous nut slapping.

By God, that'd bring the judges around, wouldn't it.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.