Last night, the General stood in line at his local purveyor of heretical literature to buy the latest Harry Potter book. I thought I should read that satanic text so that I could better understand our enemy.
Unfortunately, I was denied an opportunity to begin my studies last night. Upon our arrival home, a demon possessed Ofjoshua causing her to wrest the book from my hands and lock me out of our command trailer. I was forced to take refuge in the little bunker I've created in our crawl space.
Our second copy of this demonic screed arrived moments ago via Amazon. I just finished reading the first page. It made me angrier than I've been since the day Ofjoshua bore her testimony in church, telling the congregation of the hardship that comes from being married to a man cursed with the tiniest of little soldiers.
A British Prime Minister, who was obviously based on Tony Blair, was the protagonist in that initial page. He was waiting for a telephone call from Our Leader, the President of the United States, a man he described as "wretched." I guess I shouldn't be surprised by this. After all, it is written in what is probably the most evil book to have ever been published in all of man's history.
Still, I'm so angry that every few minutes, I'm overcome with a furious rage that causes me to sit up in my bunker and bang my head on the sewer line that runs beneath our command trailer.
Our Leader must retaliate. He needs to show the British that he will not stand for their insolence. I think it's time that he betray the identities of every agent in MI6.
Update for those who read it: I'm guessing that R.A.B. = Regulus Alphard? Black.
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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.