Help Me Reach 12 on the Manly Scale of Absolute Gender

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Monday, October 24, 2005

Coffee swilling gentile* fired from teaching

Brent M. Thorne
Superintendent, Sevier School District
Richfield, Utah

Dear Dr. Thorne,

It's a sad day in Zion when a school district can be sued for firing a latter day Korihor. Certainly, that's what is happening in Sevier County. Erin Jensen thought she could scandalize our community with her public coffee drinking and corrupt our children with discussions about world beliefs, but she was wrong.

You and the school board stood up to her. During your inquistion, you brought out the truth about her love of hot drinks and the possibility that she practices witchcraft, and then destroyed her by alleging that "Halloween is her favorite holiday and she doesn't hide the fact she prefers the dark side."

Now, she's fighting back in a court. Let's hope she's unsuccessful. We need to be able to weed out unbelievers from the treaching ranks and replace them with God-fearing, priestood-holding men who will prepare our children to build the New Jerusalem in Jackson County, Missouri. Otherwise, we might just as well be Jehovahs Witnesses.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

*In Utah, even Jews are gentiles.

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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.