She'll shank you if the President asks her to

Tom Hansen, Chief Marketing Officer
TM Advertising

Dear Mr. Hansen,

Harriet Miers's Supreme Court nomination has been in trouble from the moment it was announced. So far, her impeccable credentials--a term on the Dallas City Council, a Distinguished Alumni Award from SMU, and a White House position in which she was entrusted with vetting every piece of paper that crossed Our Leader's desk--have not been enough to quiet concerns about her qualifications to serve on the Court. Her nomination needs a shot in the arm, and it needs it right now.

After seeing the work you did for Boeing and Bell on the Osprey, I'm convinced you're the only company that can pull this off. Your Osprey piece was magnificent. The tagline, "It descends from the heavens. Ironically it unleashes hell," was so good it prompted my little soldier to rise up out of his long slumber and fire a triple-load salute. I'm sure it scared the living hell out of foreigners all the way from Edmonton to Adelaide.

You can do the same for Miss Miers's nomination. I'm thinking along the lines of something like this:



Well, what do you think? Are you up to the challenge?

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot