Intelligent Denial (or Defeating marriage's greatest enemy, Louis Pasteur)

William A. Dembski
Director, The International Society for Complexity, Information, and Design

Dear Mr. Dembski,

One of the biggest hurdles we face in selling Intelligent Design to a more rational public is its remoteness to their everyday lives. Although the Book of Genesis provides all the proof our base needs to embrace ID, it's just not enough for our reality-based brethren and non-brethren. I believe that your recent work with Lubavitcher ID proponents may provide us with what we need to change that.

How many times has your wife angrily confronted you for exposing her to a certain species of louse that is commonly associated with unclean persons of rather dubious moral character? I think we've all been there, haven't we. Well, your Lubavitcher colleagues provide us with the perfect response:

The issue with spontaneously generated worms is very simple. True, experiments do allow for following the process through which a worm [larva] develops from an egg. And, when there are also explanations for the process of how these eggs were laid, that allows for the conclusion that these specific worms were created through a reproductive process. However, when eggs found in rot are identified as belonging to a specific species of worm, and the worms found there also bear signs of belonging to that species, that in no way proves that it is impossible for these worms to have appeared without the eggs, through spontaneous generation.

Thus we have an answer that will instantly end our wives' angry queries. If the Intelligent Designer can cause worms to spontaneously generate, surely He can do the same for the lowly crab louse.

That, my friend, is how we make ID relevant to everyone.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

Update: I think we can all agree with Catholic Jackson's attached report to the General even if he or non-he is a papist.