The stench of defeatism hangs heavy over the wankosphere

Capt. Ed Morrisey
Captain's Quarters

Dear Capt. Ed,

The stench of defeatism is hanging heavy over our beloved wankosphere. Many of the 101st Fighting Keyboarders' finest warriors are wavering when we need them most. They are growing weary as they toil at their keyboards, waiting for the long, hard work of final mop-up operations to end.

I guess I can't blame them. It seems like generations have passed since Our Leader declared our mission accomplished and Deputy Leader Dick assured us that we had turned the corner. Unfortunately, none of us realized then that the corner was more of a curve than a ninety-degree joining of two roads or that the curve turned so gently, it may takes us decades to completely round it. That's what's driving our comrades to dismay.

This cancerous defeatism is spreading very quickly. It has already felled such great keyboard commandos as the Anchoress and neo-neocon, and even Cabinboy Steven is beginning to waver. We must act quickly to stop it from infecting others.

That's why I'm asking you to join me in promoting my "Cheetos for Chickenhawks" project. I created it to raise the 101st Fighting Keyboarders' morale by sending them bags of Cheetos and subscriptions to Udders: The Magazine for the Red State Man. I'm also developing a car magnet shaped like a hand flashing a "V for Victory" sign (the fingers will be stained the color of Cheetos) that we can send them as well.

Well, what do you think? Can I count on your help?

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot