Help Me Reach 12 on the Manly Scale of Absolute Gender

If you like the patriotic work we're doing, please consider donating a few dollars. We could use it. (if asked for my email, use "gen.jc.christian@gmail.com.")
Thanks!

Friday, December 17, 2010

The Opinuary Column

SONG FOR JOHN BOEHNER*



From Gail Collins
Boehner is opposed to extending unemployment benefits for the jobless, and he wants to kill off the law that guarantees health coverage to all Americans. So you know when he starts weeping when his wife says she’s “real proud” of him, it’s not a sign of softness.

In 2007, he cried while delivering a speech on the floor of the House, in support of funding for the war in Iraq. “After 3,000 of our fellow citizens died at the hands of these terrorists, when are we going to stand up and take them on?” he sobbed.

Then this year, he voted against providing money to take care of our fellow citizens who became ill while doing rescue and reclamation work at ground zero after the terrorist attack.
America: where pathology meets unfettered avarice, and then they go fuck their brains out.

*Loudon Wainwright III wrote the lyrics to "The Man Who Couldn't Cry" which he sang on his fourth album Attempted Mustache.

2 comments:

  1. It's his liver that's making him cry. It's trying to send Weeper of the House Boner a message. It hurts. Lay off the sauce!

    Making his skin turn orange wasn't enough to make Bonzer listen to Mr. Liver. If the weeping doesn't work, look for abdomenal distention, brown urine and frequent vomiting of green bile. Possibly in conjunction with staggering, hallucinations and physically violent behaviour should the DT clause be invoked.

    There is no bipartisanship where Mr. Liver is concerned. He's no Obama.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Mr. MJS, Sir:

    Repreaweebittoooooosensitive Boner is allus in a tizzy that somebody who NEEDS help might prevent him and his lickedboot superiors from the shit that they WANT, which is all of it, forever.

    I do hope that co-respondent Bukko Canukko is right about his liver talking to him. I also hope that the Boneruphisassman is too busy shrieking to listen. The ultimate silence (aside from my laughter) will be worth it.

    ReplyDelete

We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.