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Monday, January 09, 2012

Jesus' Commando to Target Murderous Nurses

Pastor Jonathan A. David
Glorious Praise Ministries
Houston, Texas

Dear Pastor David,

In a recent blog post, you alerted us to a great evil arising out of the nursing industry. Here's what you had to say about it:
Statistics reveal that there has been an upward spike in the incidents of depression, marital disruptions, family breakdown, parental neglect, emotional instability, increased stress, murders and other violent crimes traceable to the homes that are directly related to professionals in this [nursing] industry.
The satanic nature of nursing should not be a surprise to anyone. Throughout history, the nursing profession has been a hotbed of witchcraft. Obviously you understand that. I suspect that's why you invited famed Nigerian child-witch pricker Pastor Helen Ukpabio to speak at your church in March.

Have you considered asking Pastor Ukpabio to lead a spiritual warfare campaign against Houston's nurses while she's there? You know she'd bring down God's full wrath on the city's healers. She's Jesus' Witchcraft Commando. The wicked of Nigeria tremble when they hear her name, and those who defend child witches are quickly instructed on the redemptive qualities of the heavy steel-toed boot.

Heterosexually your,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

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