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Friday, January 26, 2007

Some of my best friends...

Jeremy Pelz
Lambda Chi Alpha Fraternity
Tarleton State University

Dear Mr. Pelz,

It's a shame that a patriot can't throw a Martin Luther King Day party where the guests wear Aunt Jemima costumes, gang apparel, and afro wigs and carry malt liquor, handguns, and fried chicken without everyone accusing him of being a racist. Fortunately, you responded wisely, using one of the most cherished confederate-American excuses, "one of [my] best friends is black or African American, whichever you deem politically correct."

It's too bad your best friend couldn't make it to the party. I'm assuming that's the case because he doesn't appear in any of the pictures. Maybe he's shy. Is that why he didn't join your fraternity?

Next time you should probably go with a safer theme, maybe a Mafia theme for Columbus Day or a drunken pedophile priest theme for St. Patricks Day.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

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