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Sunday, June 24, 2007

Freeway Jihadist Training Camp

REPORT TO: General J.C. Christian, Patriot
FROM: Darryl, Hominid Views
DATE: 24 Jun 2007
SUBJECT: Freeway Jihadist Training Camp

Saturday evening I went into deep non-official cover (NOC) on a mission bearing VP designation Treated As: Top Secret/SCI. The last 20 hours have taken me into the deepest bowels of enemy territory where I have investigated the materials and methods used in their liberal jihad against our American way of security.

At 20:15 I rendezvoused beneath a highway--in a seedy Seattle neighborhood known for its radical liberal madrassas--with that Frenchman of the Freeways who goes by codename FreewayBlogger .

We then preceded into a cave-like room where he broadcast an hour of far-left extremist propaganda, flaunting the authorities, and spreading the terror of unchecked free expression. At 22:30 we retired to a radical safe-house where we spent most of the night ingesting meals ready to drink (MRD) while discussing the forthcoming day of training camp.

At 08:00 today, the freeway franco-freethinker began his insurgency training. The first lesson was on the art of salvaging the raw materials for these improvised expression devices (IEDs). An hour later he returned with a vehicle-load of cellulose-based substrate and other supplies:

The next step was to coat the substrate to a uniform colorometric rendering necessary for containing the active components:

After a brief curing period, the substrate was suspended so that an optical transfer appliance could be used to leave trace elements on the substrate surface, forming the dangerous "E" part of the IED:

Next a high contrast residue was applied to the trace which, when cured, would become the powerful weapon of the insurgents:

Two hours later we had completed some 18 new IEDs:

I last saw FreewayBlogger at 17:00 after helping him load the IEDs into his vehicle. He drove off into the sunset intent on planting them along the roadways of the greater Seattle metropolitan area.

Already I've heard radio reports of gigantic expressions around the highways of the city inflicting substantial damage and mass injury among the most patriotic of the willing coalitioners. I expect some propoganda images will be posted soon.

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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.