Another Front in the Great Patriotic War Against Children

On Monday, I noted Our Leaders opposition to funding the State Children's Insurance Program (SCHIP), and suggested that it's time to fully adopt the conservative values promoted by President Bush, Grover Norquist, and movement conservatives and drive the final stake through the nanny-state's heart by repealing the child labor laws. By doing so we could ensure that every child has an opportunity to obtain health care by taking advantage of tax credits and health care savings accounts.

Yesterday, I illustrated how SCHIP could impact the important work we're doing providing work for defense contractors, oil speculators, and other patriotically-minded sociopaths in Iraq.

Today, let's look at another front our Republican party has opened up in the Great Patriotic War Against Children: the crusade against kindergarten. We scored a great victory in Idaho earlier this year when the Idaho House of Representatives passed a resolution denouncing the evils of kindergarten. One of the sponsors of that resolution, Rep. Steven Thayn (R-Dueling Banjos), is now taking the next step and leading a taskforce to study the best way to defund preschool and kindergarten. "Every time we start a program that costs money," Thayne declares, "we're actually forcing more mothers out of the home."

That's unacceptable to good, movement conservatives like Thayne and myself. We understand that mothers are the first line of defense against the godless influences of education. A mother's place is in the home, where she can welcome her children home from their electronics factory jobs by giving them a nice home-cooked dinner.