Where are the noggins of yesteryear?

John Gibson
Fox News Channel

cc: Roger Ailes

Dear Mr. Gibson,

I suspect that the French are going to try to crucify you for your "five in the noggin" comment now that the truth about the execution of Jean Charles De Menezes is known. I hope you don't let it bother you.

Sure, De Menezes wasn't actually acting suspiciously. He wasn't running, he didn't jump a turnstile; the police aren't sure whether he was the man who left the flat they had under surveillance; and he wasn't wearing a heavy coat in July. That doesn't mean that the police shouldn't have shot him seven times in the head while he sat in his subway seat. After all, he was brown, and he wore clothing that could have concealed a bomb. It doesn't take much clothing to hide an explosive device. Remember Richard Reid, the shoe bomber?

You could probably avoid the condemnation of those who hate freedom if you pointed this out on your show. Heck, you could even turn it into a public service special by providing tips to brown people about how to avoid being shot seven times in the head by the state security apparatus.

You could begin the show by discussing how frightening brown people are to god-fearing, white, conservative, Christian people. Then, you could move onto a piece on how easily bombs can be hidden in clothing. Follow that with a plea that brown people stop wearing clothing in public. A short clip from the movie, Man on Fire, should come next--the part where Denzel Washington (or is it Morgan Freeman--they look so much alike) puts a bomb in one of those Bill O'Reilly things and shoves it up the corrupt cop's wootie hole. Then finish the show by asking brown people to walk around clutching their ankles with their hands so that the police know they're not hiding anything down there.

It might be unpleasant seeing all those naked brown people duck-walking everywhere, but that's the price we must pay for freedom.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot