Drugs are Bad, M'Kay

Daniel Baranowski
Middletown Township Police Department

Officer Baranowski,

I applaud your recent decision to raid the Spencer's Gifts at the Oxford Valley Mall. It's not just any police officer who would undertake such a risky mission, but keeping our kids from seeing frisbees with pot leaves on them is a dirty job, and someone has to do it.

For those who don't think that there's real danger here, I can testify otherwise. One day last spring, I was with my son at the mall, and I saw one of those "water-pipes" on sale, and I was captivated by it. The next day I returned to buy it, and spent several months trying to figure out what to do with it. Eventually, my son's friend showed me what to do with it, and the next thing I remember, I'd burned my lips on the nacho cheese dispenser at Wawa. These people must be stopped from providing a dangerous gateway to a dangerous gateway drug.

But my son's friend also informed me that even if you don't have one of those "water-pipes," you can just use an empty soda can! I never realized how much danger all of us are in. Please know that if you decide to invade the food court, you'll have my support.

In sobriety,
T.H.