Why they're little, green, and angry

Chuck Johnson
Little Green Footballs
Pajamas Media

Dear Chuck,

According to an article in the LA Times, Pajamas Media is having a hard time signing up advertisers because they're afraid of being associated with your commenters at Little Green Footballs. I can't understand why these corporations wouldn't want to peddle their products to your readers--especially the tube sock and palm hair removal industries--but according to the report, advertisers have a problem with angry, brown-people-hating genocide enthusiasts.

Perhaps if you cut back on the "angry" part of the equation, you'd be able to change their minds. I think I know a way that you can accomplish that. Just ask your readers to follow Silvio Berlusconi's lead and swear off sex in the name of a righteous cause. Of course, you wouldn't want to do it for the same reason--Il Duce is sacrificing sex in the name of electoral victory. Instead, your readers should make a vow to remain chaste until we achieve a final victory in the Eternal War to Resubjugate Brown People. The beauty of that is that it's indefinite. Indeed, it's likely that we'll never see it. It's designed that way.

Some might suggest that swearing off sex would just make your readers angrier, but we both know that's not the case, because sex is the reason they're angry. Like the General, their little soldiers are casualties of Klinton's war against masculinity. Years of feminist indoctrination have made it impossible for their little sturmtruppen to rise at revelry. Sex brings them nothing but embarrassment. Sure, the seduction is enjoyable, but once they get past all the crying and vomiting, they're met with taunts of "floppy boy" and "Jesus! General, you're nothing but a buck private" or, um, something like that.

Try it. Ask your readers to swear off sex until we achieve victory. I think that after a few weeks, you'll find them discussing ethnic cleansing plans more civilly than you thought was possible.

Then the advertisers will come.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

Show Chuck some love. With only one day left in balloting for the Jewish and Israeli [and Eliminationist] Blog awards, Little Green Footballs holds a slim lead over the French-minded Jewlicious. You can cast your vote for genocide, here.