Help Me Reach 12 on the Manly Scale of Absolute Gender

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Monday, March 13, 2006

What sister-wives do on their days off

Pastor Scott Ledbetter
God's Remnant Church

Dear Pastor Ledbetter,

My curiosity was piqued by the following statement you wrote in your "polygamist wife wanted" ad at polygamy.com:

We do not believe in homosexual relationships! Although we believe that the 'two women' are okay as long as it does not take the place of the male.

I'm not sure I know what you mean by this. After all, we both know that women don't have little soldiers and therefore can't be homosexuals. Are you suggesting that it is OK for a man to lie with multiple wives at the same time? If that's the case, wouldn't it compound the problems men like ourselves have when we bed a woman? It's hard enough to put up with one woman's crying, vomiting, and cutting remarks about the size and virility of our little soldiers. I can't imagine doubling or tripling it would make it any better.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

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