Letters from Nedd

From: info@stoptheaclu.org
To: shanon
CC: "Gen. JC Christian, patriot"
Sent: Friday, July 07, 2006 3:40 PM
Subject: [FWD: Invitation from Nedd]

Where do you live, so-called "General"? If you are in the Midwest somewhere, I'll challenge you to a public debate and take on every argument you can make and dismantle them all. I'll embarrass the heck out of you. Your so-called "General" is as phony as a $9 bill.

You think you know me? Believe me, you don't. I'm not like most of the rest of those you have likely contacted.

Are you a man or a mouse?

Nedd

I respond:

Subject: Re: Invitation from Nedd
From: "Gen. JC Christian, patriot"
Date: Fri, July 07, 2006 10:53 pm
To: ,

I'm not stupid. I can see right through your code. $9 bill? That's three $3 bills, as in the old saying about homosexuals. Is this some kind of invitation? Are you asking me where I live so you can come over and touch me inappropriately? Do you enjoy gladiator movies like Spartacus, The Robe, and Ben Hur?

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

Ned replies:

Subject: RE: Invitation from Nedd
From: info@stoptheaclu.org
Date: Sat, 08 Jul 2006 19:12:20 -0700
To: "Gen. JC Christian, patriot"

You know what you are? You're a chicken, let alone chicken shit. You're a wuss, not to mention a tin horn dictator who wouldn't know Jesus Christ from Lucifer. You're big and tough behind that keyboard but you run away like a little mouse when you are challenged. You big baby!

OK, I've had enough:

Dear Nedd,

I've tried to control my temper thus far, but you entered very dangerous territory when you called me a "chicken" and a "big baby." I'm not going to stand still for it. Indeed, I'm going to follow the example Our Savior set when he spied the money changers in the temple and open up a big ole can of whoop-ass on you.

I hereby challenge you to a wrestle me in the manner of our ancient Spartan forebearers. Now, don't get excited. This wrestling match will not be held in the square of warriors--I'm not wrestling you as an equal--rather, we will grapple each other in the circle of shame, the ancient place of justice where true men of war met their lessers, naked and un-oiled, armed with nothing more that their terrible spatulas of retribution, to teach the rabble the importance of knowing their place.

You live in Illinois. I live in Washington State. So let's split the difference and meet at Ghormley Park in Moscow, ID. I'll be there from 2-4 PM this Saturday. If you have any balls whatsoever, you and your spatula will be there.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot