Kung Fu Christian
Dear Mr. Norris,
A grateful nation thanks you for your efforts to take this country back from the Godless Jews, Mormons, Hindus, Catholics, atheists, etc. I hope you continue to work hard to bring about the kind of government that isn't afraid to subjugate the wicked, the idolatrous, and the unchurched in the name of the Lord. Certainly, your recent essay in World Net Daily gets us a little closer to that great day of judgement. I salute you for that.I am a little worried, however, that you didn't make a stronger argument in favor of a religious test being applied to those seeking office or employment by the government. While the letter from John Jay to Jedidiah Morse you cite makes a compelling case for requiring government officials to be Christian, I don't think it carries quite as much weight as Article VI, Section III of the Constitution which states in part: "...but no religious test shall ever be required as a qualification to any office or public trust under the United States."
I'm afraid you're going to have to do a lot better than a letter to overcome a Constitutional clause. I know that's not easy for you. Logic and reasoned argument aren't your strong suits. You kick stuntmen's asses and you do it very well. Perhaps you should go with what you know--use your strengths to establish God's kingdom here in America.
That's why I'm asking you to go to St. Philip's Episcopal Church in Charleston, find the grave of the author of that vile clause, Charles Pinckney, dig up his body, and kick it's ass. But you have to do it right and kick his ass good, like how Bruce Lee kicked your ass in Return of the Dragon in '72. Only then, will you discredit him.
Surely, Pinckney's corpse's ass kicking will convince such great American thinkers as John Derbyshire, Mark Steyn, and John Hindenraker, to rally for the cause. They love to see others fight and die for their principles, especially if it appears to be a very manly kind of fight with lots of chest hair, muscles, and sweat. We need them. That's why you have to kick Pinkney's corpse's bony ass.
After that, you'll need to go after the guys who gave him the idea, the drafters of the Virginia's Statute for Religious Freedom, Thomas Jefferson and James Madison, and whoop their corpses' asses too.
I hope you'll follow through with this, and if you do, please takes lots of photos. They'd be a great addition to part two of your World Net Daily essay.
Heterosexually yours,
Gen. JC Christian, patriot
