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Dear Mr. Phillips,
Like you, I'm very angry about how the organizers of the official Jamestown quadricentennial celebrations portrayed the settlements first white Christian settlers as a bunch of blood-crazed, terrorist, genocidal, cannibals, when in truth, these great men were the brown peoples saviors. Without the lynchings, wars, and disease the settlers used to bring the local tribes into Christ's fold, the natives would have died as pagans and been sent directly to Hell.
I appreciate everything you've done to rehabilitate the white Christian settlers at your own celebrations. Hopefully, some of the uplifting stories you tell about use of "harsh conversion techniques" will eventually be adopted by the National Park Service and become part of the official Jamestown story.
The same goes for the graphics you've created. Have you shared any of them with the Park Service. I'm particularly taken with the Jaws-themed one where a great white Christian sailing shark is about to consume a wicked pagan brown man in a canoe. That's just the kind of metaphor that'll capture the publics' imagination. You should maybe turn it into a series. The next one could be based on a poster from the movie, The Andromeda Strain and feature a guy in one of those biohazard hotsuits passing out blankets at a native village. But I'm sure you're already working on that.
Heterosexually yours,
Gen. JC Christian, patriot
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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.