Help Me Reach 12 on the Manly Scale of Absolute Gender

If you like the patriotic work we're doing, please consider donating a few dollars. We could use it. (if asked for my email, use "gen.jc.christian@gmail.com.")
Thanks!

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Our most cherished heartland values

Another example of the police interfering in a heartlander's stewardship of her beasts

OK, I made a dozen jokes about guys (uhhh, other guys) not being attentive and losing interest way too quickly, but perhaps I better just leave this one alone.

Update: I think I found her theme song:

10 comments:

  1. I'm appalled, offended, and most of all disappointed by this story. Imagine, posting an article about this crime without specifying exactly what it was they spread on themselves to get the dog interested. I mean, it couldn't have been peanut butter because it gets all gunked up and makes a mess of the sheets. If anyone finds out what the substance was, it would be a community service to post it here.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm thinking chili. Everybody loves chili.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I thought I was going to have to give you an anatomy lesson until I re-read the link and realize it said "beasts" and not "breasts."

    Peanut butter is my guess. It takes my dog longer to like peanut butter out of a Kong toy than any other food substance I've tried. She goes through squirtable canned cheese like it's not even there. If you add a dog biscuit or two you can get even more mileage. I'm just sayin'.

    ReplyDelete
  4. That would be "lick" in the previous comment ... LICK peanut butter out of a Kong toy. She likes it, too, but the licking is the relevant thing.

    ReplyDelete
  5. My coffeespit moment:

    When the police report said that . . . . "the dog then appeared to lose interest and walked out of view of the camera . . . "

    One cannot blame Toby, can one?

    ReplyDelete
  6. It doesn't get much more insulting than when the dog loses interest. But I will try cheez whiz next. Thanks, kwach!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Anonymous3:57 AM

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    ReplyDelete
  8. i'm always too slow to camera over and catch the good stuff Dammit!

    ReplyDelete
  9. The Beagle was asking for it. They're all asking for it. All the time.

    ReplyDelete
  10. General, Sir:

    Until I read this I was not paying any particular attention to the dog next door that's been barking for the last four or five hours. Now, I'm curious. BTW, wtf is a Kong toy; some kind of dogdo?

    ReplyDelete

We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.