Dear Chaplain Klingenschmitt,
Far too often, Christians respond to charges of wrongdoing by either turning the other cheek or by quickly repenting and asking for forgiveness. That's the wrong response--it's wimpy and unmanly. It's not what Jehovah would have done. He'd have kicked some ass; he'd have smited the offender's whole city with hemorrhoids.
That's why I was so happy to see your response to charges that you were improperly wearing your uniform for political and religious purposes. You didn't turn the other cheek. No, you uttered the following imprecatory prayer:
Almighty God, today we pray imprecatory prayers from Psalm 109 against the enemies of religious liberty, including Barry Lynn and Mikey Weinstein, who recently issued a press release attacking me personally. God, do not remain silent, for wicked men surround me and tell lies about me. We bless them, but they curse us. Therefore, find them guilty, not me. Let their days be few, and replace them with godly people. Plunder their fields and seize their assets. Cut off their descendants. And remember their sins. In Jesus’ name. Amen.Now some might say that Our Lord, God of Abraham, would be engaging in a bit of overkill if He granted all of your requests. I mean, hey, is economic ruin and impotence (that's what you mean by cutting off descendants isn't it--I'd have gone more for, "Please Lord, dry up their testicles like a raisin in the Negev sun," but that's just me) really an appropriate response to a cease and desist letter from a lawyer? I have one response to such wimps. Look up Judges 2:23-24. God sent two she bears to eat 42 children simply because they mocked a bald guy. You're letting Weinstein and Lynn off pretty easy if you ask me. Heck, you're not even going after their teeth.
Gen. JC Christian, patriot