Rep. Sheryl J. Briggs
House of Representatives
State of Maine
Dear Rep. Briggs,
I'm always touched when I'm blessed with an opportunity to witness a good Christian mother providing loving guidance to her daughter. And I'll admit it, I may be an 11 on the manly scale of absolute gender, but the tears were rolling down my face as I saw you share one such intimate moment with your daughter on Tuesday. It isn't often that we are given the gift of observing a mother rebuke a wicked daughter for engaging in acts of sodomy. It's even more rare to witness a mother doing it on the floor of the state legislature in front of cameras. That's an uncommon kind of love, an act of love that few mothers are in a position to share with their daughters. I hope she was there to witness it, and if not, she at least had an opportunity to see it live on the television you keep in the home you share.
But is it enough. Isn't there more you could do to publicly shame your prodigal daughter. Have you considered writing the words "SINFUL WHORE" in bold capital letters on her forehead with a sharpy as she sleeps? Or better yet, have you asked the House Christian caucus to help you exorcise the homosex demon from her body--that would make for a great youtube video.
Please consider doing both if you haven't already, and send me a link when you do.
Heterosexually yours in a chaste and biblically appropriate kind of way,
Gen. JC Christian, patriot