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Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Little Paper Butterfly Wings of Conquest

Buffalo Rick Galeener
Riders United for A Sovereign America

Dear Mr. Galeener,

You might remember me. I wrote you awhile back to thank you for defending America by courageously exposing your little buffalo to a young Mexican mother and her two-year-old son. It was a brave act on your part. I mean my God, your tiny flesh rifle could have been stung by a bee or laughed at or something. But you took that risk, and by doing so, you poignantly demonstrated the rich depth and superiority of our culture. I imagine they'll remember that moment for the rest of their lives.

But that was only one fearsome toddler. Last week, you faced an even bigger threat, the 75+ Mexican-American children who marched against family-splitting deportation policies in Phoenix. It could have gotten very ugly. I've seen the photos. Dozens of little brown children wearing their paper butterfly wings of conquest as they marched past you and your handful of friends. Thank God you brought your guns. No telling what those kids would have done had you not been packing heat.

Was it your idea to intimidate the children by coming armed? It was brilliant.

I can just imagine how great you must have felt when you saw the expressions of fear on those kid's faces. I bet it even felt better than showing them your manthingy.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot


  1. I can just imagine how great you must have felt when you saw the expressions of fear on those kid's faces imagine how he feels when he finds out that the man standing next to him packing heat, with the camera and sunglasses is a woman and has a bigger penis than he does. [Ya gotta click the link, really.]

  2. jcricket, should I add that she goes by "Jackie 40D" on youtube.

  3. Is that referring to above the belt, or below?

  4. Uncle Linda! Get back in that trailer before I tell daddy! Sweet 'n Sweaty Jesus Beef Liver Christ, but I cannot abide public displays of sexual ambiguity! Hie thee to the Tin Mansion, and pronto!


  5. The thing is, these morethansorta-brown future lawbreakers were dressed as BUTTERFLIES! And what do you do with a butterfly? You shoot it, of course, if it tries to get away from you when you try to grab it so you can pull its wings off, or wheh you can't whack it with a stick because its flight path is so erratic. Damn them things, anyway, that they won't stand still so's I can kill 'em!

    My only quibble is that the sidearms these Arizona patriots were carrying are not the right tool for butterflies. A 12-guage with birdshot would be better. Bonus points if it's a sawed-off.

  6. they had to go armed! Everybody knows them mescans carry knives! Just ask Lou Dobbs.

  7. That lady is a sweet lookin ride. Imagine waking up next to that after a hot drunken night of sweaty sex.

  8. Anonymous7:42 AM

    This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

  9. General, Sir:

    First a question; is Rozydesouza any kin to Dinesh?

    Okay, so, I can see packin' heat at the buttrfly parade. Oneathem kids daddy might be this guy:

    I think I'd be strappin' on somehting bigger than a 9, ifunowudimean.


    While I have been trained by the General's firm but gently (cattle) prodding to respect womanlihoodishness, well, what can I say. Actually if your scenario were to unfold with this correspondent in either the top or bottom position I would hope to hell that Lynne's still strapped so that I could wrestle the gun out of its holster and shoot--myself.

  10. Fuck! I hate the internetztubez, but I can't live without them!!

    Try this one:

  11. First you fear him, then you respect him, then you kill him

    Great parallel, Dave. 'Cept I'm guessing our buddies Ranger Rick and the Rough Riders would rather skip that namby-pamby librul "respect" part.

  12. "convicted public urinator"
    well, that's all we need to know then.
    Bunch of asshats.

  13. I hope that asshat comes down with Alzheimer's and a Mexican CNA has to take care of him. I hope she uses sandpaper to wipe his butt.
    He deserves worse, but you wouldn't print it.

  14. f*k that's sad. What pathetic "patriotic" sacks of wasted man meat, like the prole that took a gun to a healthcare forum with the president, these filthy, loser, cant get a fuck without forcing it, cheeto eating scum are trying to intimidate gorgious children. I spit on their corpses!

  15. General, Sir:

    At another blog which I sometimes visit, there are some folks who pointed out that it's perfectly legal for these folks to carry guns--as it is for anyone over the age of 18 in the state of AZ. There are some exceptions, such as people who are felons, but other than that it's just "Hey, look at my cool rod!". So, I bet that if the parade organizers showed up strapped that everybody would be cool with that.

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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.