Mayor, Hyrum City, Utah
Dear Brother Howard,
One would think LaVon G. Hansen deserves to be treated a whole lot better than he was at your July Fourth celebration. I mean, hey, here's a guy who lived the kind of life one would expect a citizen of a city named after the Prophet's brother should live. He fought Nazi communists in World War II. He attends Sunday school, sacrament meeting, and priesthood meeting every Sunday. He's careful to eat the required daily amount of red punch and green jello. No doubt he even gave all his boys good Mormon names like LaDell, LaVere, LaMar, LaDean, and LaElmer.Yet, you still forced him to suffer the indignity of hearing the the city's official Fourth of July prayer spoken in a language favored by Mexicans. Good Lord, what were you thinking?
Mr. Hansen was right to complain when he wrote: "If I had my way, I would have the City Council members impeached and sent to Mexico. If they don’t like America enough to have a prayer in English, then they hadn’t ought to live here."
And he's not the only one. Apparently, the whole city has its ass in an uproar.
It sounds like one of those tolerance things to me. You get a gentile to do the prayer so the ACLU doesn't jump your ass for having a state religion. How do you think the Lord feels about that? He sure as hell wasn't into all that tolerance crap. The very sight of Amorites, Jebusites, or Arkansans would send him into an immaculate shit-tizzy and he'd command the faithful to kill every last man, woman, and child of their tribe.
Think about that the next time you're tempted to swap out the Lord's English in the name of "tolerance."
Heterosexually yours,
Gen. JC Christian, patriot
Elsewhere: China can see Sarah from its kitchen window.
And Up the IRA!
