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Showing posts with label Mother's Day. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mother's Day. Show all posts

Friday, May 08, 2009

The Opinuary Column



The Opinion Why yes, dear, that blouse does make you look fat has died as a result of blunt force trauma after having been caught off-guard while getting ready for a dinner party last Saturday night. The Opinion, which had kept to itself and minded its own business for many years while leading a quiet and uneventful life, pretty much blew everything in a thoughtless moment of casual honesty.

A service honoring the memory of the Opinion will be held this Sunday morning. Men who attend are advised to keep their mouths shut for most of the day--this means before, during and after the service. Burial conducted by Tewlitel Tewlate Family Mortuary.

Special Note: Happy Mother's Day! You look so young! Have you lost weight? You look terrific!

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