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Friday, October 09, 2009

The Opinuary Column



The Opinion "No, they would never do that!" has passed away after a long, dull illness, leaving behind a large contingent of disbelieving friends and relatives who are aghast that apparently there are indeed those in the world who would "do that" and they'd do it to your grandmother and your children and anybody else that stands between them and a few dollars more. Indeed, there are those who would take money for years and years as payment for health insurance, and then one day tell you why they don't have to give you what you've paid for, and maybe you should fuck off while you're at it.

In lieu of flowers, family of the late Opinion ask that you consider thinking for a time about the 45,000 Americans whose death is attributable to their not having health insurance. See you at the wake.

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The Opinuary Column appears Friday afternoons at Jesus' General.

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p.s. Happy Anniversary of your birth, John Lennon! Words are still flowing!

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6 comments:

  1. Yoko Ono, the 'widow' to John Lennon, Kurt Kobain and Heath Ledger,and now ElvisPresley was recently quoted as referring to The Georgia GuideStones as..

    "I want people to know about the stones ... We're headed toward a world where we might blow ourselves up and maybe the globe will not exist ... it's a nice time to reaffirm ourselves, knowing all the beautiful things that are in this country and the Georgia Stones symbolize that. "

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  2. Wow, Yoko sure got around. What a slut.

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  3. It's quite important that people keep believing "No one would do anything like that." Because if they believe there are some things that are so morally repulsive that no smart capitalist would do them, then they won't take steps to protect against the possibility.

    For instance, those pitiful cans collecting small change to help pay for Little Sally's liver transplant are almost never secured to the counters of the 7-Elevens and other such places where you find them. Because "nobody would ever steal THAT!" Yeah, keep believing that, suckers. As long as you do, some people will never lack for beer money!

    Uhhh, not ME, of course. I would NEVER do that...

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  4. I visited your site to challenge you to learn about 'contiguous dimensional worlds' and how they show Christian belief and its command to love to be understandable, logical and evidenced in a technical sense. But your site uses vulgarities and slogans indicative of anger and not of reasonable thinking. ''Techie Worlds', available at Amazon.com, explains this concept in detail. But some sites like yours are set up to attack the computers of those who wish to comment, so I will hit delete and shut down my system as quickly as possible.
    GeorgeRic

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  5. GeorgeRic, we hardly knew ye!

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  6. Don't forget to thoroughly douse the computer with a 50-50 mixture of bleach and boiling water! Quick, before the infection sets in!

    No, don't dump it on the keyboard and the monitor, you nitwit -- the contagion is in that box thingie that makes the whirring noises! Do it now -- you can't even delay to unplug the accursed thing!

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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.