The Heresy of the "Male G Spot"

Robert Irwin
Author
Sexual Skills For The Christian Husband

Dear Mr. Irwin,

It's come to my attention that you discuss something you call the "The Male G Spot" in your book on Christian sexual skills. You might think you're fooling people people by calling it that, but we both know what you're really talking about there. It's the naughty button men have up their butts. And I have to tell you I'm shocked. No decent Christian man would allow anyone to stick their finger or anything else up there to push it.

I mean, my gosh, what would Jesus do? 

Well, he sure as hell wouldn't be doing that. I mean, hey, you show me a single place in the Gospels where it says:

And Jesus showed unto Simon, the Fisherman, the finger trick in his secret parts. And Simon rejoiced and shoutethed hosannas for he had comethed. And then Jesus spake, "Come Simon and do unto me as I have done onto you." And Thomas saw the reach-around and it was good.

No, you won't find that in the bible because it ain't there, Mr. Squirrely-Shorts.

That's why I rebuke you in the name of our Lord, Jesus Christ.

Amen.

Heterosexually yours

Gen. JC Christian, patriot