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Friday, March 06, 2009

Ray Comfort on the vagina

Ray Comfort
Atheist Fighter

Dear Mr. Comfort,

I really enjoyed your response to all the criticism your book received at Amazon. As the author of the "most helpful" positive review* , I, too, am disgusted with those who unashamedly stooped to using science, reason, logic to pan your book. I look forward to the day when Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, sends them to the fiery pits of Hell to suffer for all eternity.

I'm glad you pointed out that your atheist detractors are intentionally omitting the comparison to Coke cans you make in your banana argument. Without the coke can comparison, your claim that bananas disprove evolution sounds ludicrous. But when it is pointed out that both have pop tops and are perfectly fitted to the human hand, the existence of a creator cannot be denied.

I'm also very happy to see that you've endorsed the main point of my review, what I call the "Eve argument." As you note, lady parts cannot be explained by evolution. Nature would have looked at the penis, and said, "It completes the crotchal area, making it more esthetically pleasing by filling up an inch or so of barren space. No more work needed." Only God could have foreseen the need a man's thingy would have for a nice, warm vacation hideaway, and He created vaginas to fill that need.

Finally, I want to thank you for supporting Joseph Farrah by publishing your response on his web site, World Net Daily. I know he's very upset about rumors on the internets tubes that he is the gay, but he's denied it. I think he just likes the mustache.

Heteosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

*Although, I have 582 "most helpful" votes, Mr. Comfort's World Net Daily readers have added about 180 "Least helpful votes," thus moving me out of the top spot (they rank by percentage of "most helpful" votes). So, give it a vote of you haven't.

8 comments:

  1. General, Sir:

    I thought at first your choice of words for the headline was a bit strange: "Ray Comfort on the vagina", but then I realized that it was appropriate as Ray has likely never been IN a vagina--preferring instead the "Cave of Shame".

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  2. In that photo of Ray, it looks like his pie hole is the exact size of that banana. Perhaps God created the banana as a stopper just for him.

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  3. Why has Mr. Comfort decided to make his point about the banana with a backdrop so obviously seductive to the orange vest wearing crowd? Is he sending signals? "Here there be phalli and Bambi."

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  4. I feel a novel coming on...

    His hand firmly, yet gently gripped the shaft of the lush, tropical fruit, his mouth pursed and poised in anticipation. Would this be his greatest triumph or his unending shame? The banana's strong and supple rind pealed back, he inhaled deeply the sweet, spongy aroma.....

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  5. Brother Ray sez, “Evolution has no explanation for the female for every species in creation.”

    Actually, don’t tell this to Brother Ray (’cuz it might make his head explode), but it’s probably the other way around. If evolutionary biologists lack an explanation for one gender or the other, it’s probably the male of the various species.

    But, hey, I’m no scientist, so what do I know. (I mean, other than the fact that Brother Ray don’t know shit from Shinola, to paraphrase Tyrone Slothrop.)

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  6. General, Sir:

    You made me click through to World Net Daily, sir. For Christ's sake, fucking World fucking Net fucking Daily? I had, sir, hoped to make it through my time on this mortal coil without ever having been on that website. Another dream dead today, then. At least I still got a shot with Christie Brinkley and Vanna White, though. Also. Sir.

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  7. From Review:
    "...My only disappointment with the proofs provided in this book is that my favorite, Eve, isn't listed among them. Evolution could have made her look like anything at all--like Rush Limbaugh, a big hairy wookie, or a naked mole rat for example. There's no way Adam would have tapped that. ..."

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  8. Your comment section, it plays with me Sir,

    From Review:
    "...My only disappointment with the proofs provided in this book is that my favorite, Eve, isn't listed among them. Evolution could have made her look like anything at all--like Rush Limbaugh, a big hairy wookie, or a naked mole rat for example. There's no way Adam would have tapped that. ..."

    LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. I went, I read, I voted for. Thanks for the fine review General Sir but 'specially for the picture accompanying your review, it was the deal-maker I couldn't refuse. ;-)

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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.