The Opinion America is dumber than a sack full of hammers has died, due in large part to a shortage of hammers. The family of the deceased wishes to assure our nation's citizenry that the late, great Opinion will soon be replaced by the newer, cutting edge Opinion America is dumber than a sack full of deep-fried moose droppings.
At the request of the Opinion no service will be held. There simply aren't enough short buses to handle all the mourners.
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The Opinuary Column appears Friday afternoons at Jesus General.
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