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Wednesday, October 07, 2009

A Good Law Dentist Puts A Smile on a Smiting

Gordon Klingenschmitt
Chaplaincy of Full Gospel Churches

cc: Dr. Orly Taitz, Esq.
Law Dentist

Dear Chaplain Klingenschmitt,

I see Mikey Weinstein is suing you for asking our Lord, Jesus, to plunder his fields, seize his assets, kill him and his family, and then wipe away his descendants for 10 generations (audio).

Responding to a prayer with a lawsuit seems a little harsh to me, but then if God listens to you better than he listens to the fans of the Fort Oglethorpe Warriors, this whole lawsuit issue could become moot.

Unfortunately, God doesn't seem to be in a hurry to get his smite on, so I guess you have to prepare for court.

That means you'll need legal counsel. Might I suggest Dr. Orly Taitz, esq? You may have heard of her. She's leading the fight to expose Barack Hussein Obama as a black man. Her understanding of the law is so complex and cutting edge, no one in the legal community can figure out what the hell she's talking about. Heck, one judge fears her intellect so much, he's even barred her from his courtroom.

She's also a dentist. Take advantage of that. She can help you focus your prayers to cause the Weinsteins to lose their teeth more efficiently--she knows right where to place the abscesses. So instead of praying, "Lord, please take Mikey Weinstein's teeth from him," you could petition Jesus to "place great and terrible abscesses between the anterior medial and posterior roots of the maxillary second molar, adjacent to the anterior face of the mandibular lateral incisor..." That'll have Weinstein begging the judge for continuances until the final smiting.

One note of caution. Dr. Taitz website appears to be hotbed for viruses. I'd wear a hot suit around her.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

A helmet tip to Matt.

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  1. There's something oddly familiar about a failed Navy officer leading a church in prayer against his enemies...wait! I know who he reminds me of!

  2. General Sir,

    The cast of characters on this one alone are astounding!

    If I was the Big Guy being asked to play My part here, I think I'd ask for a script...

  3. well done, whatever your name is..Dr Shannon Yahoo, or perhaps its RN Kerry alexander Keggler?
    who cares. Your English grammar has come a very long way since april 28th ( the picture hasnt changed tho )
    trivia Ft dix... who was on the same basketball team as Sandy Koufax

    Your One and Only Trout Mask Replica,
    Terence Mcmanus


We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.