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Wednesday, December 01, 2010

Amazon Review: "White Apocalypse"

You remember Kyle Bristow. He's that former Young Americans for Freedom leader who was in the news a few years ago for inviting the BNP's Nick Griffin to speak on his campus. He's now in the news again because of his association with a candidate who's running to replace Michael Steele at the RNC and a book he's published that claims Norwegians were the first Americans (it also features the assassinations of characters who appear to be modeled on the tolerancofascists at the Southern Poverty Law Center.)

Well, if Kyle's going to write a book, I'm going to write an Amazon review for it. It's here. Please consider voting to make it the "Most Popular Favorable Review."
4.0 out of 5 stars Tracking the Norwegians of Ancient Israel, November 30, 2010
Gen. JC Christian, patriot (Tremonton, UT United States) - See all my reviews
This review is from: White Apocalypse (Paperback)
Saul Anuzis, a candidate to replace Michael Steele as the Chaiman of the Republican National Committee, once said of the author of this book, "he's exactly the type of young kid we want out there." As someone who's followed Kyle Bristow's career since he was a Young Americans for Freedom leader, I have to agree. The kid has guts. He demonstrated that when he invited Nick Griffin, leader of the Britisch Vaterländisch Partei (BNP) to speak at his college. I thought he was through after that, but like a phoenix strung up on a twisted cross, he has risen again.

This is the book that will make Kyle Bristol as famous and as revered as Dr. William Pierce, author of the Turner Diaries. I have no doubt about it. It has an irresistible appeal to those of us who proudly suck each breath from between our teeth. We want to believe Mr. Bristow's thesis that Norwegians are the only true Americans, and that we were here first, long before the Indians. Indeed, we want to shout the words Mr. Bristow proudly posts at the top of his blog: "I am the vanguard of the Volk, the hero of the Occident, and the arch-nemesis of the enemies of my people. I live in occupied Vinland, and I am the epitome of Western Man."

That's not to say the book is perfect. It isn't. Bristow fails to fully explore the scope of Norwegian Exceptionalism. There is no mention of Father Abrahamson, whom God first blessed with the gift of lutefisk and an assurance that his descendants would be God's chosen people. Nor is there any mention of Schlomo Noahson, who was the first Norwegian to step off the Ark onto Vinland's soil after the Great Flood. Worst of all, he fails to tell the story of the greatest Norwegian, Jesus Letsjustcallthepoorfatherlessbastardjosephson, who redeemed our sins by being crucified on a giant herring (the proof of which can be seen stuck on the back of any Christian's car).


  1. Wotan and Thor seem to like the book.

  2. I love the way the righteous, whiteous book cover designer has made Old Glory out to look like a semi-submerged swastika. But why are they giving in to political correctness?!? Show your true colours by having the twisted cross symbol of the Whitest Reich covered in the red, white and blue! What's the matter, Bristow, are you afraid of how some üntermenschen will react? Are you some kinda chicken? BUCK-BUCK-BUCRAW!!!

  3. General, you have navigated the Amazon! I mean, your review is up!

  4. General, Sir:

    WTF kinda name is "Kyle"? It sounds, like, uberTehGhey, no shit.

  5. Just remember, kids, you can’t spell Anuzi without an N, A, Z and I.

  6. '100 Swedes came out of the weeds, chasing one Norweeeeeg-ian.' Or so my ancestors used to say. They were 'special' alright, but more in the context of 'short bus' than 'exceptional.' Grandma Lil got her news from the National Enquirer, swears she saw a UFO while she lived in Montana, believed there were perverts behind every bush (sort of like Michele Bachmann) and thought photo negatives proved blacks were lower down in the evolutionary scale. Obviously, not all Norwegians are stupid, gullible racists (although all of my Norwegian family and most of their friends fit that bill), but any culture that gave us fish soaked in lye and tasteless flat potato tortillas as the height of their cultural contribution is a bit of an odd choice for the Lord's special attention, don't you think? Uff da.


We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.