Public Relations Officer
Nebo School District
Spanish Fork, UT
Dear Sister Hiskey,
I couldn't agree more. It's inappropriate to post a sign urging gay kids to not commit suicide. And, yes, it's even worse if the sign is posted at a location where gay kids can see it. I also agree that the sign exposes children to "adult themes" by declaring that "gays are born gay."
One can only imagine what effect such an adult themed sign is having on the kids. No doubt at least half the third grade is donning smoking jackets or bustiers while swilling martinis and flinging ashes from smokes dangling from long cigarette holders.
However, I must object to your treatment of the sign-maker's ten-year-old granddaughter. Sure, she deserved to be interrogated--after all, her grandfather posted the sign on his property facing the school. But why stop with a simple grilling? You suspected she might have lesbian tendencies. Why didn't you subject her to a BYU-style reparative therapy session and jolt her with 10,000 volts of soul-healing love?
Heterosexually yours (in a chaste and thoroughly Book of Mormon appropriate way),
Gen. JC Christian, patriot
Here's the video (I must say that Sister Hiskey just radiates the spirit of the Relief Society).