God Was Just Funnin' With Lisa Welchel

Survivor reality-actress Lisa Whelchel has a very close relationship with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Homer Christ. Indeed, she loves our Redeemer with such fervor, she refused to act in an episode of her hit 80's sitcom, "The Facts of Life," because it dealt with premarital sex.

As a young mother, Sister Welchel used her celebrity to teach other moms how to train their children up in the ways of the Lord:

For lying or other offenses of the tongue, I 'spank' my kids' tongues. I put a tiny drop of hot sauce on the end of my finger and dab it onto my child's tongue.

And of course, whenever Sister Lisa has to make a big decision, she leaves it up to Jesus to make it for her. That's exactly what she did when Steve Cauble, the pastor of the celebrity Bible study group she attended with Debbie Boone, Charlene Tilton, and Donna Summer, asked for her hand in opposite sex marriage:

I had my hands lifted to the Lord as a gesture of praise when I felt the sensation of a gentle weight descend upon me. I recognized this feeling as the presence of the Holy Spirit. And because this kind of thing doesn’t happen every day, or even every year, I knew enough to pay attention. As I waited expectantly, the thought popped into my head, Would you ever consider marrying Steve Cauble?

[...]

Okay, I believe there is a God. I have met Him personally, and He has proven Himself trustworthy in my life many times. I know that I know that He adores me and that He is good through and through. He is stronger than the devil’s schemes, and He is more powerful than circumstances, coincidences, or cowardliness. I could rest in this because I also knew for certain that I had sought His will with a pure heart.

The choice was mine. Was I going to trust God or trust my heart? I knew the decision I had to make, and I felt an unexplainable peace about it. When I boarded a plane home, I was wearing my new engagement ring and carrying the “Now That You Are Engaged” book I had purchased earlier in the week. I figured that since I had decided to marry this man whether the feelings were there or not, I could probably use all the help I could get...

When I got off that plane, I ran into my fiancé’s arms and gave him the sloppiest kiss you ever did see!

What do you know that you know that you know about God? Do you believe that He is all-powerful? Do you trust that He is all-good? Is He all-loving and all-holy? These are questions that you need to settle in your heart. There may come a time in your life when the only thing you can count on is the character of God. And that will be enough.

Twenty-four years later, Jesus, probably 3 jugs of water to the wind, blurted out to Sister Welchel that he was just "funnin'" with her; Pastor Steve was never meant to be her husband. Relieved, Lisa and Steve quickly filed for divorce.