Help Me Reach 12 on the Manly Scale of Absolute Gender

If you like the patriotic work we're doing, please consider donating a few dollars. We could use it. (if asked for my email, use "")

Tuesday, April 06, 2010

We don't need you comin' 'round here with your fancy teeth-in-your-mouth ways

The good parents of students at Fulton, Mississippi's Itawamba Agricultural High School didn't want homosexualists or slow kids at the Jesus People Prom so they sent them invitations to a second, secret prom for pariahs instead. I think they were worried the latter would drool and the former would use it as lube.

They also created a Christ-centered Facebook group to take the homosexualist to task for complaining about their biblically-approved bigotry. It's called "Constance quit yer cryin." Here's what their supporters are saying there:
Mitchell Henderson: lulz rug munchers are hilarious. Come join me in hell, there's ipods all around for dance parties. As long as you bring someone to scissor with.

Melody Carol: JAlthough, she asked and they said no, she should have just stfu and dealt with it. The school did not need to cancel the prom to shift attention from here. That's just gay.

Brittany Kay Brown: jeremy, that's your fault for not coming out of the closet. IAHS is not a bigoted school. This whole town is based on Christianity.

Caleb Waddle: i just wish she would shut up and quit makeing the freakin county stupid you say well its there fault but since when did the public do anything to you just shut the freak up already.

Traci Taylor: Carnathan who wants to c 2 girls makn out...especially one of them thats parents are totally against it.

Fall Fundraiser: Please give if you can.


  1. Traci Taylor: Carnathan who wants to c 2 girls makn out...especially one of them thats parents are totally against it.

    Traci: Sodomy with a permission slip is awesome!


  2. General, Sir:

    That's the problem with closeted gays. Who knows how many of teh GAYfascists went to that their hootenany, looking and acting just like the KKKristians?

  3. Who wants to see two girls making out?

    Is that a rhetorical question?

  4. ...and anuthar thin. Weez need too stop spindin so mutch munies on lurnin how to writ Amerkin.

  5. Wicked fakeout, Slack Jaw County! You and Shunning Jesus showed her what for.

  6. Yo Gen,

    When did they stop teachin' the English in Sippi high school?

  7. Anyone else out there in favor of extending the Mason-Dixon line all the way across America and just writing off everything to the south of it?

  8. Your parents, teachers, and religious leaders must really be proud of how you turned out. But then again: garbage in, garbage out.

  9. It's probably a good thing that none of these kids has considered attending college. Can you imagine being a college admissions clerk and realizing you're holding the (misspelled, crayon-etched, tobacco-juice-stained) application of a student from Itawamba Agricultural High School? Can you say hand sanitizer?

  10. I'll make the same suggestion I made at PZMyers's site: There is no appropriate English word for the kind of hateful thing that happened here. So I suggest coining one: "fultonry". That seems like an appropriate legacy for the good people of Fulton, Missouri. It also has a nice ring to it, methinks.

  11. Traci Taylor: Carnathan who wants to c 2 girls makn out...especially one of them thats parents are totally against it.

    The irony of ironies is that if you're a guy and you don't want to see two girls making out, that means you're probably gay.

  12. @G.D. That's Fulton, Mississippi - not Missouri. Fulton, Missouri is a pretty OK place.

  13. I went to thatthere "Constance kwitchercryin" Faceplant page and saw that they were open-minded enough to allow people to post all sorts of criticism of the prom separatists, and in defence of the lesbodanceyfascist. And that's just great! Because it will allow the Lord to see who opposes His Ways, and send them all to hell.

    It's important to let the wicked announce their sin openly. If they keep it in their hearts and don't act upon those evil thoughts, then they can't be damned by a Merciful God. At least I hope so. Because if I could be punished for the sick thoughts and hateful desires I have kept inside because I've been afraid to act on them, I'm gonna roast fer sher.

  14. Anonymous3:26 PM

    "Mitchell Henderson"

    Ist this a troll? Because I can't possibly the only person here who knows what you find when you google this particular name. Hmmm.

  15. Here, Here!@Holytape

  16. Please tell me the English teacher is working hard to teach give these high school children proper spelling and grammar. I mean, if the teachers can't instill decent values, they should at least teach them how to hate literately.


We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.