Jesus' General

The Democrats can never be as manly as our leader

The General thinks that George Will is worrying a bit too much when he writes:

New Hampshire confirmed what Iowa intimated. Democrats who are serious about the candidates' electability understand that seriousness requires a retreat from the feminization of politics.

That explains Democrats' short-lived flirtation with Wesley Clark, the empty uniform who, were a Democrat now president, probably would be on the right flank of Republicans running this year. And the Democrats' movement away from feminization explains John Kerry's brisk forward march, with a military cadence.

Kerry's "patrician aloofness" may be manly reticence...Riding his Harley, gunning for Iowa pheasants and playing hockey in New Hampshire have expressed his campaign's subtext: manliness.

I'd be the first to admit that I find Kerry extremely attractive in a very manly, heterosexual kind of way. And I do want to emphasize the heterosexual aspect of my longing for him. Sure, my little soldier may stand at attention when I see his strong masculine fingers wrapping themselves firmly around a microphone's rock hard shaft, but that doesn't mean I'm sexually attracted to him. It's a natural reaction that occurs when a warrior feels the presence of another of his kind. It's a very many heterosexual thing. I can't stress that enough.

I shouldn't have to keep repeating this. You should know by now that I'm not a homosexual. I mean, I do spend most of my time fighting their agenda, don't I? So why in the name of Our Leader do I have to constantly defend myself?

Sorry, I got of track there. We don't have to worry about Kerry. He's no way near as manly as Our Leader. Did you see him in that flight suit? Wow, his soldier ain't all that litt...all of you people who don't believe me can just go straight to Hell. I believe in traditional values. So screw you. Especially Jed. He's a god damned liar. Don't believe a word he says. Besides, I was drunk. So to hell with him and his lying ass.

Uhh...please forgive me for cussing, but I've had enough of your filthy, slanderous thoughts. In fact, I think I might take a few days off to shoot guns, watch football, spit, yell at strangers about welfare, and all of the other very manly things I like to do. Yeah, that's it. I'm going off to do the things real men, like myself, do.