Targeting the patriot demographic

Serving in the vanguard of the Glorious Conservative Christian Revolution isn't easy. It's very hard work. I think that's why it attracts a certain kind of man. We're all conservative and Christian of course, but we also have other qualities that some might perceive as weaknesses.

You see we're a frightened bunch. We're scared of nearly everything. That's why we own so many guns and are so gung ho about sending poor people out to shoot, bomb, torture, and imprison those who scare us. That fear might seem like a negative quality at first glance, but it, along with impotence and feelings of powerlessness, is what drives us to achieve so much.

This probably isn't a major revelation to most of you. It's pretty damned obvious to anyone who's thought about how advertisers target us. Switch Rush, Hannity, or O'Reilly on and you'll hear wall-to-wall ads for male enhancement products and wealth building seminars. You don't have to be a student of Freud to see that they're targeting our fears of powerlessness and impotence.

Newsmax.com is an even better place to see this kind of marketing in action, As I write this, Newsmax's home page is playing host to at least 4 "get rich quick," 1 "how to pick up women," and 2 "how to beat the crap out of someone" ads. Such marketing is so transparent, I'm beginning to blush.

Regular readers might remember that I've written about some of these advertisers before. Who can forget Matt Furey's promise to teach us how to break a man's arm in a street fight. Now that's a talent you can use every day.

But there's an even better ad up now,"Quick-Learn Impaling Tricks." With one click, we are taken to a page where a patriot tells us:

Here's one hell of a brutal "fight-solution" for you.

If your life is ever threatened by an attacker... no matter how big, mean, and ugly he is... I want you to throw a standard paper clip -- just like the one pictured here -- and embed it deep into his forehead from 16-feet away. I assure you...

No... I haven't been drinking. Give me a chance to explain.

I've just got my hands on some very exclusive info on the lost art of "power throwing"... and I want to share it all with you. It's the real thing and this may be the last time you hear about this! So please... read on.

Here's what this is about: I call this power throwing... a "lost art" because there's just FIVE masters who understand this - and four of them are either dead... in prison... or just won't talk. So you simply can't find this anywhere for any price. I'm not kidding one bit when I say this is info is teetering on becoming a lost art.

But now I've arranged your one chance to know these secrets.

And that's just one of the many courses available through this company. They have over fifty instructors ready to teach you everything you need to know about kicking a guys ass in a street fight. And these teachers aren't poseurs either. They all have credentials like these:

Jim Arvanitis ... "Sir" to every fighter who's ever come up against him, in the street or in the ring... is so FEARED in the martial arts world that whenever he shows up at a fight convention 6th degree black belts will leave the room rather than cross his path.

He's that scary.

[...]

Mr. Arvanitis is the ONLY Grand Master in the style he teaches. It's called "Pankration" -- which is Greek for "kick some serious ass".

Yeah, that's a smoke in his hand. He's so bad, he'll beat you to a pulp while he's having a cigarette break.

I want to be like that. No one will dare call me tiny boy then, god dammit.