I am Macacan

Chris LaCivita
Advisor, George Allen for Senate

Dear Mr. LaCivita,

I understand you're looking for a "blog maven" to work with George Allen. I hope you'll consider my application.

The Allen/Webb race is very close. Tight races are my forte (that's not a French
word, is it?). My last-minute endorsement of Jean Schmidt gave her the push she needed to overcome Paul Hackett in the final days of that race. Sen. Joe Lieberman was down by 12 points in the Connecticut Democratic primary until I launched my "Give 'em Zell, Joe" blog campaign. I moved him up eight points by election day.

Don't take my word for it. Our domestic enemies know how effective I am.

Gene "Atrios" Lyons of Eschaton:

It's over -- Schmidt has received the most important endorsement in the country - that of General J.C. Christian, Patriot.

Markos Moulitsas of Daily Kos:

J.C. Christian came out for Jean Schmidt. His endorsement is a blow to Hackett's efforts, no doubt. I hoped he would, at worst, remain neutral. Sigh...

Bob Brigham of The Swing State Project:

But today Jean Schmidt received a major endorsement, from General J.C. Christian, Patriot.

I've given Sen. Allen's recent troubles a bit of thought. I'd like to share a few ideas with you as a demonstration of my abilities. I think everyone agrees that calling Webb's staffer "Macaca" was a mistake, but most do so for the wrong reasons.

It wasn't wrong for him to use a racial slur--hey, he was campaigning in a very red part of Virginia after all--however, it was wrong to use a French racial slur. It made him appear effete and elitist. He should have gone for something more traditional, something with roots in our own heritage. But that's hindsight. He used "Macaca," so we're stuck with it, however, if we play it right, we might be able to do a little ju jitsu and make it work for us.

Gwyneth Paltrow is receiving a great deal of attention for an ad she did recently in which she called herself an African. Now, people in our circles wouldn't normally think that was a good thing, but it's one of those kind of hip-looking ads the kids really like. Heck, I even think it's kind of cool.

I'm thinking that we could do something similar with Sen. Allen. It's tricky finding the right balance between racism and tolerance that allows us to speak to our base while still providing us with plausible deniability, but I think I'm close.

What do you think? Do you like it?

When do I start blogging for Allen?

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot