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Thursday, June 14, 2007

When Liberals Howl at the Moon

Before I begin I would like to say how flattered that I am to have been invited by Mr. General to be a guest host on his blog. Much like our friends at Fox News, Mr. General has shown that he has a Fair and Balanced® way of looking at the world around him. Obviously, due to their skewed sense of reality, “fair and balanced” is a concept that is far beyond the grasp of Mr. General’s Liberal readers. Therefore, I will try and dumb-down, if you will, my contribution this afternoon, in an effort even the playing field for those readers. As a fair and balanced person myself, I want to see that everyone who visits this blog will stand a reasonable chance at taking something valuable from my message.

This morning over coffee, I happened across an article on Yahoo News titled, Strange Things Do Happen at Full Moon.

In part the article reads, "Recently BBC News reported that some British police departments have decided to add extra officers on nights with a full moon.

The concern isn't over werewolves or vampires—no need to issue silver bullets or wooden stakes—but more human threats such as petty thieves and violent criminals.

For years, some who work in police and emergency services (such as doctors and nurses) have anecdotally claimed that full moon nights are busier, crazier, and more dangerous than nights when the moon is dim. This perception may be rooted more in psychology than reality."

After reading the piece it occurred to me that, a full moon could cause undesirable effects on the personalities of Liberals and non-Believers, as well the mentally unstable. After all, most if not all Liberals are emotionally and spiritually unstable, so it is reasonable to assume that a full moon would make them even more aggressive and unpleasant to be around.

As if the typical Liberal isn’t crude enough there does seem to be a lot more flaunting of sin and deprivation during a full moon. Aren’t most “Gay Prides” held during a full moon?

What about abortions? Why, I bet that if research studies were conducted we would discover that more little innocent babies are executed during a full moon than any other time.

Libido and promiscuity seems to rise during a full moon. What say you, Slutty Liberal girls and Homosexuals? Do you go into hunt mode and look for more indiscriminate sexual partners than usual?

I bet for the Liberals it’s a lot more fun bashing America and President George W. Bush during a full moon. Does having a little more light outside in the evenings make you want to be even more unpatriotic than normal?

Surely, there must be must be something to this full moon theory. What else could explain away the evil ways of a Democrat? They live in a perpetual state of sin so it cannot be that that they have spiritually slipped. They love blaming everything away on “science” so it has to be the full moon. Doesn’t it?

I don’t know about you but I plan to stay inside, curl up with the Good Book, and lock the doors during the next full moon. Given the current state of this country, I just don’t think I’d feel safe with all those crazy Liberals outside howling at the moon.

Mrs. T.D. Gaines-Crockett is a proud member of Baptists For Brownback 2008.

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