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Tuesday, January 22, 2008

When Mary met Jesus: Tales from the Christian Dating Scene

It's not easy being a servant of the Lord, especially when it comes to dating. Sure, Catholic priests and mega-church pastors get all the action they want, but it's much more difficult for the rest of us. That's especially true for prophetesses like Jennifer Lyn Joy. You can almost feel her pain and desperation in the diary entries she wrote while attending a conference in Canada:

June 15, 2001
Friday Morning: My first day to take rings (Glory Rings) into worship up to the fourth floor “box”, which was designated for radical worship. There were two men worshipping….I did not speak to them. The LORD wanted me to meet them but I was too shy to introduce myself. So, I said to the LORD that HE would have to manage the introductions.

I think we've all been there. We see a hot, sexy gal or guy. We know the Lord wants us to break out the glory rings and get down to some anointing, but we're too shy, so we leave it up to Him.

Thank God (literally), He hears our prayers:

June 15, 2001
Friday Evening: Cindy went ahead of me and found a place in the long line outside as there were about 3000 at the conference. When I caught up with Cindy, she was standing-in-line talking to the two men that were in the "box" upstairs worshipping during the morning service. I laughed inside knowing the LORD had set this up. I met John of The Maranatha Group and Bruce.

But with Jennifer and Cindy, not only did God make the introductions, he also provided the equipment.

John was carrying an arsenal bag of worship instruments that I really wanted him to open.

Ladies, haven't you all been there?

He would not open it while we were standing-in-line outside but waited until we arrived to the "box" on the fourth floor. When John opened his arsenal first he pulled out an Elijah Mantle (I have one of those), then a flag from Albany (I have one of those), then a blue prayer cloth (I have one of those), bottles of anointing oil (I have some of those)...

Is it getting hot in here?

Then he pulled out a solid steel hammer with a 40-pound head! (I do not have one of those!) During worship he lifted the hammer over his head as though it weighed 2 pounds not 40 pounds and began hammering. Oh JESUS!

OH JESUS, indeed. That is one huge hammer!

I don't know about the rest of you, but I just involuntarily anointed myself.

I thought to myself, I simply must have a hammer, a "girl hammer!"

Ladies, you know you've all thought the same thing. I bet many of you have even overcame your embarrassment and bought one. Same for the guys. I'll admit it. If it's good enough for Bill O'Reilly, it's good enough for me.

A little over six years later, I am releasing this for the first time and how the LORD moved during that time in Canada, which is still impacting the call of GOD upon my life. John and Bruce’s faithfully prayed for me, anointed me with oil and prayed over my worship instruments.

Uhhh, maybe I better just stop there. It's starting to read like one of those letters you see in Rectory Magazine. You know, the ones that always start out "I read these letters in your magazine, and I never thought it'd happen to me..." If I keep going I'm sure to anoint myself again.

Anyway, you get my point. The Christian dating scene is tough, but carrying a bag of worship instruments helps. That and a certain fluency when speaking in tongues.

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