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Thursday, April 10, 2008

Surging Against Wolfofascism

Cat Urbigkit
Sublette County Predation Board
Pinedale, WY

Dear Ms. Urbigkit,

Congratulations on your recent victories in the glorious war against wolfofascism. It's hard to believe that it's been only two weeks since Our Leader wisely delisted gray wolves as an endangered species. So much has been accomplished in that short time.

In the first week alone, 12 wolfofascist dead-enders, comprising over 3.4% of Wyoming's total wolf population (359), were executed in the Cowboy State's free fire zones (At least 10 of those were shot in your county alone). At that rate, you're on track to liberate the state from the last remnant of wolfen tyranny by 6:00am, October 30, 2008.

Unfortunately, we have not seen the same level of success in the permissive liberal enclaves of Idaho and Montana. They've refused to follow Wyoming's example. They do not allow wolves to be shot on sight without a permit. Instead, they've opted for controlled hunts.

I fear Wyoming will suffer from their failure to follow your lead. I already suspect that the wolfofascists based within those states are providing assistance to the terrorist packs near Jackson Hole.

That's why I urge you to expand the war into Idaho and Montana. It shouldn't take much to pull it off. All you need is a surge. Invite Deputy Leader Cheney, Supreme Lawgiver Scalia, and a handful of the administration's fish and wildlife appointees to a party on the border; issue each of them a rifle, some ammo, and a case of Coors; then turn them loose. They will liberate the Mountain West from the sharp teeth of wolfofascist tyranny in a matter of hours.

Heterosexually yours in a chaste, biblically appropriate kind of way,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot

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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.