This is an important revelation, and like other great revelations before it, I'm sure it will be added to the Doctrine and Covenants, one of the Church's four standard scriptural works (along with the Bible, Book of Mormon, and Pearl of Great Price). And I suppose when it is added, it will look something like this:
D&C Sec. 139. A Revaluation Given to Six Elders of Zion on March 23, 2009
1. And behold, the Spirit of the Lord descended upon seven Elders of Zion and commanded them to tarry unto the newspapers, radio, and the television shows and make excuses for Elder Jay Bybee's torture memos.
2. "Go now, Elder Harry Reid to the Maddow show," commandeth God,
3."And yea, also Elders Randall Guynn, Christopher L. Blakesley, Tuan Samahon, Thomas McAffee, and Steve Guynn go ye unto the Washington Post, Las Vegas CityLife, and that show on French Public Radio, All Things Considered."
4. "And telleth them this: 'Judge Bybee doth not deserve impeachment for his memos were written by others and he is incompetent.'"
5. "And prepareth thineselves to defend other Elders like Timothy E. Flanigan who also shapethed the torture policy and Elders James E. Mitchell and John B. Jessen who createthed the torture techniques."
6. "For I am a powerful and omniscient God who diggeth torture."
7. "Oh, and yea, I am the Lord yet I almost forgot, my servant Elder Orson Scott Card, I command thee to go say some really crazy shit about the gay."