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Monday, May 18, 2009

Doug McKelway is Heterosexual and Cletis is a God Damned Liar

Doug McKelway
Anchorman, ABC 7
Washington, DC

Dear Mr. McKelway,

I see you're still catching a lot of hell for threatening to beat up Mike Rogers. I don't understand why his defenders just don't get it. I mean, hey, there's nothing wrong with a man going out and proving his heterosexually by taking another man's little soldier into his various orifices, or putting his in theirs, for that matter. Nothing wrong with that at all as long as he continues to also prove his heterosexuality in a more public manner, like by supporting anti-the-gay legislation, or even threatening to punch a the-gay activist during a television interview. You know, like you did. It certainly convinced me that you're a bona fide heterosexual. And you shouldn't be outed for doing so, because there's nothing to be outed for, right. You provedit  yourself.

I'm interviewing Mike Rogers tonight in Second Life (7pm Pacific). I think I'll threaten to punch him too. Lord knows, I'm always having to prove my heterosexuality because of that lying bastard Cletis. Sherry the militia morale sheep is a lady sheep dammit. Sure, they look like testicles, but that's just a thing some sheep have. Anyway, Cletis is a lying bastard and I'll prove it by threatening to punch Mike Rogers, tonight. I hope you can come.

Heterosexually yours

Gen. JC Christian, patriot


  1. Did you punch away Mike Rogers' homosexuality? Or did your joining with him in an interview turn you in to one of Them?

  2. I thought it was kinda sweet the way it ended with them having a movie date for Friday night, didn't you?


We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.