CNBC Sports Business Reporter
Dear Mr. Rovell,
Thanks for pointing out that the winner of the Men's NYC Marathon was only "technically American," but it should have been obvious to most CNBC and Fox viewers, anyway. Just look at his name, "Meb Keflezigi." Real Merakins have names like Patrick Buchanan, Vito Fosella, and Otto Reich. It's even more obvious when you see him. He ain't even caucasian. Everyone knows the back of a Real Merakin's neck turns red in the sun.
But pointing out that he's only "technically American" isn't a solution to the problem of Real Merakins consistently getting their asses whipped in the Men's NYC Marathon.
I'm not sure there's a fix for that actually. It just may be that it's impossible to produce endurance runners whose diets consist of pork rinds, Frito pie, and Pabst Blue Ribbon. Perhaps, we need to set a more achievable goal, or, better yet, create events a Real Merakin could win.
Here are a few ideas:
- The Pensacola Premature Ejaculation Sprint.
- The Colorado Springs Road Rage 500.
- The Brigham Young University Invitational Dry Hump.
- The West Texas Lone Gunman Random Person Shoot.
- The CNBC Wall Street Knee Drop.
- The Heartland Dipolypmics (already established--see enclosed video).
Gen. JC Christian, patriot
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