Help Me Reach 12 on the Manly Scale of Absolute Gender

If you like the patriotic work we're doing, please consider donating a few dollars. We could use it. (if asked for my email, use "")

Friday, April 08, 2011

Easy Riders

As I write this, our courageous congressional warriors who serve in the House Republican Caucus are on the verge of giving our nation the greatest gift of all: shutting down the Satanocommunist government. It hasn't been easy. The filthy compassiofacist Democrats have fought them all the way by offering compromises. "We'll meet you on the numbers," they promise, "if you'll strip away your riders." Thank God, our GOP generals are refusing to give up anything.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the budget process, a "rider" is a piece of legislation that is attached to a bill. It may have nothing to do with the subject of a bill, or, as is often the case with budget bills, the rider may earmark specific funding or cuts that would not appear in the more broadly written budget bill.

These two Republican Caucus riders have gotten a lot of attention:
  • Sec. 4013 — Prohibits funds to the Planned Parenthood Federation of America
  • Sec. 1591 — Prohibits funding for needle exchange programs
But there are many more that are just as vital to the conservative cause. These riders include:
  • Sec. 4573: Prohibits funding projects that beam socialist microwaves into our brains.
  • Sec. 2111: Provides a tax break to senators who use adult diapers for non-medical reasons.
  • Sec. 7504: Prohibits funding for any project that would pollute our precious bodily fluids with fluoride.
  • Sec. 1009: Provides a tax break to any congressman who "butches up" his closet.
  • Sec. 3345: Requires welfare recipients to bid for their food stamps in a blind auction.
  • Sec. 2798: Provides a tax break for Jesus' second coming expenses.
  • Sec. 1479: Allows the "man of the house" to claim a tax deduction for the care and feeding of his uterus.
This, my colonels, is what we are fighting for.

Something else: Lose something? Call Waukesha County Clerk Kathy Nickolaus at 262-548-7010 and ask her to check her computer.


  1. Looks like someone idolizes Katherine Harris!!!

  2. Sorry you have to copy and paste. I'm too tired to be inter-tubes savvy.

  3. Patriotikkk Republikkkans know that governments are like Injuns in old Western movies (which were REAL, BTW) -- the only good one is a dead one. It's why they have to campaign so hard and ask for so much money from rich people to buy TV ads -- so they can kill the government they struggled to become a part of. It's like cancer -- better to destroy from the inside.

    Thank Gawd the Republikkkans are close to killing the United States government. Maybe it will only be dead for a little while, before it gets up like a zombie, but a couple more shots to the head (Jeb/Palin 2012) oughta finish it. Then we can be FREEEEEEE! to live in a country with no government or any pesky laws. All that we'll need is guns to have a perfect civilization. If everybody just walks around with a gun in their hand, pointing it at everybody else, life will be peaceful and orderly. No government necessary at all.

    And with no laws, I wouldn't even have to wear any clothes when I go outside my house! (Except a belt to hold my guns and ammo.) You don't like my nekkid looks? Talk to the hand. The one pointing a gun at you, you law-loving governmentofascist.

  4. General, Sir:

    Tell me that ain't Sheilah the Morale Ewe on that sheepjeep!

  5. Sir General Sir:

    You forgot the Republican cure for hunger in America:

    Sec. 1392.16: Publish a list of Republican approved restaurants, so the #!%# lazy hungry people know where to go when they get hungry.

    The gods bless America!

    Oh, by the way, I comment on the picture:

    Sammy-Samm-Samwise Galenorn


We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.