Florida: Red America's Mecca

Kevin Beary
Orange County Sheriff

Dear Sheriff Beary,

I'm very impressed by the tenacity you demonstrated in your pursuit of Alice Gawronski. I don't think she'll be writing any more letters to the newspaper accusing you of using taser guns on suspects because you're too physically unfit too chase them. I hope you tasered her impertinent butt when you caught her.

I understand that the Florida Legislature recently passed a bill to allow citizens to exercise their God given right to engage in gunplay in the streets. Perhaps once the bill is enacted, you could shoot Mrs. Gawnowski when she's leaving her local Piggly Wiggly with an arm full of groceries. I think that would send a powerful message to others who treat law enforcement officers disrespectfully.

Heterosexually yours,

Gen. JC Christian, patriot