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Monday, December 28, 2009
Der Popenfuhrer und der Ziegenjungend
Posted by
Anonymous
Satan knows it takes a lot to prod the pope into sinning. Sometimes, it's Gucci. Other times, it's Prada. This time, he dressed an altar boy up like a sheep.
Der Popenfuhrer seems to be planting a big wet one while his little lamb, (wearing his plaid jammies under the shearling garb), is giving the 'white knuckle grip'.
Sir, it seems that little boys in plaid jammies with white knuckles are the new human sacrifice. Who knew that the Vatican was so pagan in its behaviors? Or maybe... this is an old tradition newly captured in glorious digital replication. If so, perhaps it is worth asking the Vatican what is worse for spiritual leadership: That no one but God and the victim know, or that we all know?
If he keeps up this silly shit, somebody's going to leap over a barrier and break ol' Popey's nose with a statuette of the Merry Virgin! Isn't that how they express dissatisfaction over there in Spaghettalia?
You know, after being tackled (by the way several NFL teams are scouting that woman) in the Christmas procession, I guess he just figured to live life to the fullest.
Bah, there's nothing wrong with a little man-lamb lip bonding, in a purely Christian non-sexual/furry sense. I'm sure that once his parents talk him out from under the bed, this boy will realize how wonderfully he's been blessed.
I wonder if Der Pope let him fondle the keys to heaven.
I think we're being a bit unfair on the Popenfuhrer. We all know that snogging a young boy is disgusting, depraved , immoral and enough to send you to hell. However, we've all had a special moment with a nice, woolly sheep. It's what real men do. It stops us masturbating. The Vatican simply doesn't have enough grass to have a sheep there to hold the seed of the Popenfuhrer's desires. However, he has show great ingenuity. He has no sheep, but plenty of small boys. Having the power of Catholicism, just like a bit of bread literally becomes the body of Christ, by applying wool to a small altar boy he literally becomes a sheep. Hey Presto! no more problem. He's a man's man again.
I amember when I was an altered boy at Our Mother Of Perpetual Beating The Snot Out Of You Fucking Recalcitrant Young Heathens In Order To Make You Perfect Soldiers Of Christ And Temples Of The Holy Squirt.
Right after school, most afternoons, I'd go over to the rectory and Father Vinnie Stecchino would mentor me. It was always "one on one" and featured equal parts manly (well man/boy to be precise) wrasslin' and fervent calling on GOD to help me defeat the sinning thoughts in my soul. After a bout of prayspelunkin' poor Father Vinnie was always a bit morose and it usually took at least two bottles of sacramental Liebfraumilch, a toke or two of Jamaican Rasta incense (for a Cath-O-Lick priest Father Vinnie was disturbingly ecumenical in the practices of other faiths--don't ask about the chickens, okay?) and a couple of amyl nitrate poppers to get him back into his usual jovial, yet devout, mood. Last I knew he had been promoted to BFC (Bishop First Class) and reassigned to help Cardinal Law bring the boys of Rome back into the fold, so to speak.
It's been said that the Oztralians have found a new use for sheep, they now EAT them.
BC, now that I'm in Canadahoovia, I think instead of throwing Aussie lamb cutlets on the barbie (we brought ours with us) I'll have to do like the locals and eat some beaver. Not sure how that'll work out...
Der Popenfuhrer seems to be planting a big wet one while his little lamb, (wearing his plaid jammies under the shearling garb), is giving the 'white knuckle grip'.
ReplyDeleteSir, it seems that little boys in plaid jammies with white knuckles are the new human sacrifice. Who knew that the Vatican was so pagan in its behaviors? Or maybe... this is an old tradition newly captured in glorious digital replication. If so, perhaps it is worth asking the Vatican what is worse for spiritual leadership: That no one but God and the victim know, or that we all know?
If he keeps up this silly shit, somebody's going to leap over a barrier and break ol' Popey's nose with a statuette of the Merry Virgin! Isn't that how they express dissatisfaction over there in Spaghettalia?
ReplyDeleteYou know, after being tackled (by the way several NFL teams are scouting that woman) in the Christmas procession, I guess he just figured to live life to the fullest.
ReplyDeleteEwe....
ReplyDelete++++
Bah, there's nothing wrong with a little man-lamb lip bonding, in a purely Christian non-sexual/furry sense. I'm sure that once his parents talk him out from under the bed, this boy will realize how wonderfully he's been blessed.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if Der Pope let him fondle the keys to heaven.
I'm originally from Wales, where we like to think that we have a monopoly on dressing our young men up like sheep.
ReplyDeleteGood thing we're not Catholic.
There ain't no black sheep in Vatican City.
ReplyDeleteGod Bless Us Everyone!
ReplyDeleteI think we're being a bit unfair on the Popenfuhrer. We all know that snogging a young boy is disgusting, depraved , immoral and enough to send you to hell. However, we've all had a special moment with a nice, woolly sheep. It's what real men do. It stops us masturbating.
ReplyDeleteThe Vatican simply doesn't have enough grass to have a sheep there to hold the seed of the Popenfuhrer's desires. However, he has show great ingenuity. He has no sheep, but plenty of small boys. Having the power of Catholicism, just like a bit of bread literally becomes the body of Christ, by applying wool to a small altar boy he literally becomes a sheep. Hey Presto! no more problem. He's a man's man again.
I think that’s the most disturbing picture I’ve ever seen.
ReplyDeletePastor...flock...the lord is my shepherd...wooly bully...oh, you work it out.
ReplyDeleteGeneral, Sir:
ReplyDeleteAny word on whether the lamb was shorn?
I amember when I was an altered boy at Our Mother Of Perpetual Beating The Snot Out Of You Fucking Recalcitrant Young Heathens In Order To Make You Perfect Soldiers Of Christ And Temples Of The Holy Squirt.
Right after school, most afternoons, I'd go over to the rectory and Father Vinnie Stecchino would mentor me. It was always "one on one" and featured equal parts manly (well man/boy to be precise) wrasslin' and fervent calling on GOD to help me defeat the sinning thoughts in my soul. After a bout of prayspelunkin' poor Father Vinnie was always a bit morose and it usually took at least two bottles of sacramental Liebfraumilch, a toke or two of Jamaican Rasta incense (for a Cath-O-Lick priest Father Vinnie was disturbingly ecumenical in the practices of other faiths--don't ask about the chickens, okay?) and a couple of amyl nitrate poppers to get him back into his usual jovial, yet devout, mood. Last I knew he had been promoted to BFC (Bishop First Class) and reassigned to help Cardinal Law bring the boys of Rome back into the fold, so to speak.
It's been said that the Oztralians have found a new use for sheep, they now EAT them.
It's a good thing the age of consent in Vatican City is 12.
ReplyDeleteSeriously.
Look it up.
Then ask yourself why.
Bukko,
ReplyDeleteThis sick, depraved habit of eating your loved ones is nothing more than a sign of the decay of our society.
As an Australian, I for one, hope this foul practise is banned.
PS. Now perhaps you know why velcro was invented by an Aussie - it grips sheep better.
BC, now that I'm in Canadahoovia, I think instead of throwing Aussie lamb cutlets on the barbie (we brought ours with us) I'll have to do like the locals and eat some beaver. Not sure how that'll work out...
ReplyDelete