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Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Giving the Gift of Death This Christmas

Long time readers may remember that although the Confederate Yankee went AWOL during God's Chosen One's Glorious Eternal War to Resubjugate the Brown, he's served admirably in the War on Christmas. Who could forget his past Christmas efforts to punish Google for committing the algorithm-based blasphemy of listing Baby Jesus butt plugs first on its search pages.

Now, it's Christmas week again, and our favorite defender of Confederate values has come up with a new way to Celebrate our Lords birth: calling for the death of a senile old man. Here's what he has to say:
Robert Byrd has been around a very long time, and his many decades of service have made West Virginia a wonderful state in which to manufacture methamphetamine or frame the locals for murder. But it's time for Senator to do the right thing, and expire.
It's an idea that seems to be catching on. Sen. Tom Coburn wants to put a dead Byrd in his creche as well:
At 4 p.m. Sunday afternoon -- nine hours before the 1 a.m. vote that would effectively clinch the legislation's passage -- Sen. Tom Coburn (R-Okla.) went to the Senate floor to propose a prayer. "What the American people ought to pray is that somebody can't make the vote tonight," he said. "That's what they ought to pray."

It was difficult to escape the conclusion that Coburn was referring to the 92-year-old, wheelchair-bound Sen. Robert Byrd (D-W.V.) who has been in and out of hospitals and lay at home ailing. It would not be easy for Byrd to get out of bed in the wee hours with deep snow on the ground and ice on the roads -- but without his vote, Democrats wouldn't have the 60 they needed.
Others, like HARDING of Patriot Force wish Wise Men would give the gift pestilence to the Speaker:
Wish I could FedEx the black plague to Pelosi's office for the satanic holiday she prefers while we celebrate Christmas- HARDING
But one doesn't necessarily need to commit murder to honor the birth of the Christ child. More squeamish patriots can buy tee shirts and bumper stickers proclaiming their desire to see someone else murder the President.

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  1. Wish I could FedEx the black plague to Pelosi's office for the satanic holiday she prefers while we celebrate Christmas.

    But then you'd have to give up your only pair of underpants.

  2. Wish I could FedEx the black plague to Pelosi's office for the satanic holiday she prefers while we celebrate Christmas

    Harding, all I can say is: Karma, baby, karma.

    As for wishing Byrd would "expire"at age's alot like demanding that the sun go away at about six o'clock PM in early March. When it happens, you can say you were prophetic.

    Who knew that using Jesus Christ as a role model would include wishing an old frail man dead, and that a Catholic grandmother would be infected with disease. i'm sure Christ is real proud.

  3. We wish you a Merry Christmas, We wish you a Merry Christmas.

    We wish you a Merry Christmas, in a climate of fear.

    Imprecatory prayin' on Senator Byrd.

    And if that don't work, a slug behind his ear.

  4. I should have added that I think The Confederate Whanker is a real he-man with his guns and hate and all. People like him scare me; not because of what he can do himself, but because he might breed.

  5. It seems Coburn the Barbarian has accepted some kind of dare to be the batshit craziest Christopublican in the US Senate. He has a way to go to catch up with his Okie colleague Inhofe, but he's been coming on strong of late. Another year or two and he'll be babbling wild-eyed to David Gregory that there couldn't be global warming since his refrigerator is still working and trying to sell his 'Dr. Tom' earwax on eBay. ("It cures everything!")

    Logically, isn't the Confederate Yankee's benighted mind caught is some kind of schizoid suicide pact? And why hasn't one side or the other succeeded by now?

    BTW, Harding, you thief, what did you do with the White House china?

    It's clear these mutants are a few ornaments short of a full Christmas tree and I'm just glad I don't have to endure any festive holiday family gatherings with them.

  6. I suppose this is an improvement over the last eight years in which we had someone in the white house actively promoting death on an international scale.

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We'll try dumping haloscan and see how it works.