Rep Aaron Schock
Reinforced Closet #B-07
US House of Representatives
Dear Rep. Schock,
I'm worried about your eternal salvation. According to a tweet you posted yesterday, you burned the homosexualist belt that had people questioning your commitment to the heterosexual lifestyle. Here's what you had to say:
Never thought a pic of me w/ my shirt on would go viral. Learned my lesson and burned the belt.
True Bible-believing Christians consider burning a homosexualist belt to be a form of heresy. If you had read Leviticus 20:13, you'd know that Our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, commands us to stone our baby blue homosexualist belts of iniquity (or cleanse them by using them to punish naughty sailors).
I trust you will ask the Lord for forgiveness.
Heterosexually Yours,
Gen. JC Christian, patriot
